The sound of silence, the scourge of vulnerability, and a shoulder to lean on
After being asked to help contribute to the Rejuvenations blog on a regular basis, my mind went straight into the fear of writer’s block. While we could sit and brainstorm topics for week to week, perhaps coordinating with months, seasons, and events of the year, I wanted the jumping off point to be a good one. How do I truly reach and touch all of our guests? The simplest solution seemed to be to ask guests directly for feedback.
I wanted to know about the struggles women today feel like they face. I had come across an article not long ago that inspired the idea. Women are expected to be nutritional experts, power lifters and yoga gurus, team mom shuffling from soccer to dance, #bossbabes climbing the vocational ladder, and a dozen other things I’m not sure I could fit into a month, much less a day or week. However, much to my dismay, the number of responses was minimal. Is life truly that simple for everyone else and only a few of us struggle?
The handful of responses I received was genuine, though. The difficulty of facing that perfectly curated social media life and the danger of comparing your own. The struggle to love and accept the body we are in. The feeling of being an outsider - single and childless - in a sea of friends with loving husbands and precious little one; the judgment of being of a non-traditional faith in a predominately Christian town. The anguish of watching a parent age and the responsibility that comes with the parent-child role reversal, as you are now the caretaker. One person messaged me directly, bringing me to tears, with a story of infidelity and addiction in her relationship. And one person posted a long, genuine response to the question I had left for the public, only to later delete it.
And that…that along with the limited number of responses made me think about where we are as women more than any question or response leveled could have. Are we really that afraid of some sort of stigma or judgment? Is vulnerability that heavily weighted as a weakness? Are we really so poised to appear “fine,” if not better than, that we can’t admit that we just aren’t okay right now?
There should be no shame in your struggle. No guilt in asking for help. No fear in needing someone more than yourself to hold it all together and keep your head above water. God didn’t put 7 billion people on this planet so we could all go day to day feeling helpless and alone.
I once came across a post on Instagram “What happens in the spa stays in the spa.” I can’t tell you how many times the door has closed behind each of us, and a simple waxing service or massage session turn into therapy. Tears cried by the guest have been shared by each of us. I cannot stress how true it is that you have a heart and home in Rejuvenations. We are more than a spa, we are family. You can choose to leave your worries at the door, or you can choose to open up to a heart made to serve and trust that your worries fall into an open mind and heart, and most-importantly, one that honors the trust you hold in them so strongly, that your words would never pass through their lips again.